QUOTABLE QUOTES FROM SOME OF ROCKNROLL'S FINEST CHARACTERS
“Rehearsals during that era tended to revolve around pub
opening times; meet midday in the pub,
“The tour manager rang to say: ‘We’ve got trouble
in the hotel.
“He said: ‘[Let’s do] the one about the cow’.
We said: ‘Er… We don’t have a song about a cow’.
“I suspect that Ginger Wildheart and I are Anthony and
“Halfway through our set, I looked around and saw out of
the corner of my eye that Patti Smith
“He was a force of nature. Most people actually need to
be sober at some point in the day,
“It was the most Spinal Tap thing I ever saw. They’ve
got three guitar players onstage
“Gene lives about five minutes from me – I can see
his ego from my house!”
“Between us and Bon Jovi we fucking built that company.
We built their penthouse sushi bar,
“I Federal Expressed a diaper full of shit to my record
company, Warner Brothers.”
“Over the years, people have made a lot of claims about
what Ken Hensley was like to work with –
“The music that I did with Metallica is awe-inspiring.
It’s maybe the best thing done by anyone, ever.
“We’re from Scarborough and we’ve come down
like Vikings, raping and pillaging… people don’t like
“Whoever’s singing that should get a fucking day
“I’ve found from my relationship with my good lady
that the one way to shut her up is to introduce a bit of horn.
“The guy’s not [even] a great singer and he acts
like he’s the coolest, hottest guy in the world. To me, he looks
“The same thing that made Peru famous [was what] made a
loser out of UFO.”
“I look back and go: ‘Wow, that was crazy’.
It was pretty disgraceful.
“My best childhood memory was meeting The Wombles. I was
six years old and it blew my mind!”
“In the last few years I’ve re-discovered Kate Bush.
She’s pretty talented and, er… she’s got great tits!”
“I never owned the first Van Halen record. I couldn’t
put it on to save my soul. I never understood it.”
“I went and saw that movie about The Doors and I was absolutely
disgusted. I walked out.
“Steve [Harris] and myself always used to clash. He wanted
to fire me after the first month of the ‘Number Of The Beast’
“In the 1980s I used to cure athlete’s foot by pouring
cocaine on my toes. They cut the stuff
“Enid [Williams] didn’t drink, except for one time.
She was staggering around backstage
“I wouldn’t send him cat food if he was starving.”
“I can’t see myself getting married, but if I wanted
children I’d just go into Harrods and buy one.
“Is there a word for something that’s beneath shit?”
“No butt plug, no matter how big, could facilitate the
gigantic anus of Courtney Love.”
“It's the stupidest thing he’s ever done. He’s
a sacred American institution of rock ‘n’ roll
“I remember going to Tony [Iommi]: ‘Fucking hell,
you want to see the thing I’ve got in bed [with me].
“I lost my virginity to an Alsatian. It pinned me up against
a wall and shot its muck all over my front.
“I started to be really proud of the fact that I was gay,
even though I wasn’t.”
“I am the best Keith Moon-type drummer in the world.”
“I think that pop music has done more for oral intercourse
than anything that ever happened, and vice versa.”
“When you get married it should be forever. Even though
I did get married once and it was annulled.”
sickens me to watch everybody fawning over Sharon Osbourne.
are not a heavy metal band, just a Punch And Judy show decorated with
came over, got drunk and threw up in the toilet, so we knew he was
the man for the job.”
spelled our name with a ‘Y’ rather than an ‘I’,
as we didn’t want people to mistake us for ‘Stripper’.”
you put a Mars bar in one of Glenn Hughes’ hands and a bass
in the other, he’ll choose the Mars bar.”
you see Thin Lizzy being reformed, it will be a thing of desperation.”
was at the BBC and accidentally walked into the wrong studio. Basil
Brush was sat at his desk.
don’t know the guy, but he’s one of the worst guitar players
I’ve ever heard in my life.
can I say? We are saving heavy metal from extinction. Most male metal
fans can’t get a fucking girlfriend.”
compromised my ideals with this new album. I look at it – sonically,
artistically and even photographically –
only chick I could fall in love with is Kate Bush. I love her, totally.
Rodgers’ hair looks a bit unnatural. He must use the same guy
as Elton john, for fuck’s sake.
on, then. Speak. Ask your questions.”
was the biggest joke in history. I [played with them because I] needed
the money, [but] they didn’t have any.
BBM] more gigs were cancelled than played. And they were awful. Unlike
Cream, everything with Gary Moore was contrived.
Chandler asked if Jimi [Hendrix] could sit in with Cream. I didn’t
know who he was; just some geezer.
hate the Stones and always have done. Mick Jagger is a musical moron.
Keith Moon was a good drummer with The Who,
been sitting her admiring my crotch for the last ten minutes.”
about two years ago I was a struggling male model for Mothercare,
still learning my craft…”
Trump is a huge fan of Gene Simmons. Mostly he’s jealous of
my hair which is much cooler than his.
disrespect because Lars [Ulrich] is great and he’s a very nice
guy, but he needs to spend a week at my house.
was secretly pining [over] getting up there and playing with them
again. [But] what song would I play?
scale of our music is like the size of a porn star’s penis –
it’s all about the length and the girth.
far as Dave [Lombardo] goes, I don’t care whether he lives or
never want to be Gene Simmons, an old man who puts on makeup to entertain
kids, like a clown going to work.”
1988 we went to see Lita Ford at the Marquee and when Jon Bon Jovi
came on for the encore everyone went nuts.
either should not have been in Guns [N’ Roses] to begin with
or should have left after ‘Lies’.
off, Led Zeppelin, you’re crap. You’ve always been crap,
and you’ll never be anything else.
gonna compare Eric Clapton with that fucking Jimmy Page? Would you
really compare that?
only decent guy – the one good guy in that band is dead.”
I was advised to plead guilty [to charges of exposing himself in a
Golden Egg restaurant in London’s Leicester Square],
Hughes is still copying Stevie Wonder to this day. I can’t call
him a bona fide member of Deep Purple.”
never listened to any of Purple Mk II’s records. What are they
called? ‘Burn’ and ‘Strongbow’, is it?
I'm in the shower washing me hair, then I feel this stinging pain
and hear this sudden plop.
was fat and self-conscious. I was a turd onstage, just a useless turd.”
this Billy Ocean? Are they black? Are they males or females?”
went into rehab a few times and every time I’d check out Dave
[Ellefson] would be waiting outside in his car,
have groupies, sure we do. Jesus Christ had groupies. He had thousands
of people following Him.
tasted success. It’s a cross between strawberry milkshake and
don’t care if someone wants to get fucked up and party, you
should at least be able to play. He did half of ‘Unskinny Bop’
want a team player, not some hired hand who’ll make one album,
get themselves a reputation and then split.”
second album will be a lot better. We’ll have two songs on it.”
run this band like The Mafia. We don’t talk about The Family
outside The Family”
punched the shit out of Sebastian [Bach], decked him right on his
fat little ass. I knocked him out and I’d do it again.
I’m a 22-year-old Metallica freak on speed. I’m psychotic.
I can drink four bottles of whiskey before I go onstage.
never had any money and I still don’t. Rock and roll should
be about people coming together as one,
Coverdale has had to make certain cosmetic changes to crack America
– ‘cosmetic’ being the operative word.”
great thing about Obituary is that we’re heavier than a bag
of donkey’s balls.”
like the old joke about the circus employee whose is job was to walk
behind the elephants and clean up [their droppings].
is that, a condom? I haven’t used one of those since I was four.”
life is part humour, part roses, part thorns. I'll come off the stage
at Texas Stadium [and] I’m a rock god.
are the most pathetic attempt at rock ‘n’ roll I’ve
“Other bands wanted to wreck hotel rooms; Roxy Music wanted
to redecorate them.”
always thought that Pink Floyd were a band for people who don't like
music or rock 'n' roll."
should be] thrown into the dustbin and never listened to by anyone
Usually. But not much."
raised the guys from Classic Rock magazine; they used to be crawling
Kiss is doing right now reminds me of like what some great fighters
did when they come out of retirement,
are] part Chippendales, part rock band."
ask how I learned to play bass [the way I do]. With a face like mine,
you learn to do a lot of things with one hand."
is dead and I am done with it."
recorded my 'Electric' album  at their studio Lartington Hall
in County Durham.
unleashed the fucking fury."
a prat. He's just a silly man in a silly wig. He's just a prat. What
more is there to say about him?
is our business and this is the revolution."
tour will be a gathering place for desperate souls. People who've
about all you wankers back there? Make some noise. You sound like
a herd of syphilitic pussies."
don't mind getting laughed at.
to England used to be like dying, being reborn and going to Valhalla,
but the British lost their minds.
Records are so excited to have Manowar on their label. They are, indeed,
Thayer used to be in a Kiss tribute band - and he still is!"
Bain couldn't mix cement. A lot of heroin was being taken, that's
why it's a crap album."
I could have my own chicken coop in the studio, my own world to live
in, I could play a lot better."
bassist] Pete Way gave me a cassette he'd made of Free. It blew me
away from the opening notes.
will continue until the spandex explodes."
I'll die onstage like Tommy Cooper. I always thought that he went
out really well - to the sound of laughter.
more concerned about W Axl Rose's facelifts than his hair. Seriously,
he looks like a candle that's starting to melt".
more like [late-'60s kids TV show] The Banana Splits
James Dio is one of the vilest people in the industry."
hope Vivian Campbell fucking dies. He's a fucking asshole.
French magazine printed my obituary. How did I die? I dunno, it was
you imagine any 14-year-old girl screaming at us in ecstasy?"
West whispered to me, 'Why don't you come on back to my trailer?'
I said: 'Because you're 86 years old and I'm not even sure
met Elvis Presley in Las Vegas in 1974. The place was bristling with
guns. Elvis asked me to hold a gun
still use it, now and again. If Percy isn't pointing at the pulchritude
then he needs a bit of a push. What's wrong with that?"
won't watch it because I don't want to think of Metallica like fragile
fucking old men that can't have a cocktail because
listen, the reason we did that movie was to piss Kerry King off.
Brothers Records know [all] about my bodily functions. I sent them
cum. I signed my record contract in piss.
the only man who's fighting to save this planet, whilst living on
[Blackmore] is a giant amongst guitar players, I don't think anyone
would dispute that. But he's an intellectual dwarf."
of these days I'm going to attack Ian Gillan in a back alley. He's
bigger than me, and probably a better fighter,
law and buy a gun."
good question... now all we need is a very good answer. I don't know."
consistently sell 80 to 100,000 albums in Japan. Metallica continue
to be enormous. Bruce Springsteen is massive.
you want to stop the spread of AIDS around the world, give it to Z
Records to distribute."
may be three years older than Jim Morrison, but I'm three years younger
than Jesus. I'm just waiting to be crucified."
Nirvana played unplugged it was truly horrible. They were adequate
rock musicians, [but] the format left them floundering."
attending this tour will go to Valhalla."
verging on ridiculous. Al was in the band before electricity, if I
snorted my father. He was cremated and I couldn't resist grinding
him up with a little bit of blow [cocaine].
many of you communicated with the dead recently? Come on London, you
have a great history as renowned necromancers.
main personality difference between myself and Ritchie [Blackmore]
was that I was terrific and he was a twat."
was pretty obvious, really. Ritchie must have been suffering from
nobody like us at the moment. There's Alice Cooper and Kiss, but we're
much better than thsoe bands."
good. When Lordi are working in the shoe store next year they can
tell everybody that.
Osbourne is a moron. He couldn't carry a tune around in a suitcase.
Ozzy. He's a special, special person. He's one of the creators of
heavy metal music. A wonderful man.
told me about a place where they teach you to drink properly. It was
the Betty Ford Centre.
ironic that Ozzy can play for the Queen, but not show up for two Ozzfests."
has their faults. I'm a stuttering Irish git, John [McCoy]'s a fat
bastard and Robin [Guy]'s a drummer."
record absolutely sucks"
always related more to the guitar than I did to people."
looks like he's wearing a coyote on his head."
answer is [for the coalition] to get the fuck out of there, build
a wall around it and sell fucking tickets."
chill the hell out, y'know? Go get a cocktail. Relax... They should
put in a whole bunch of Irish taverns;
British music press are fucking wankers. They eat shit in the bath."
as gay as a daffodil, dear."
I didn't have Freddie Mercury's lyrics to hold on to as a kid, I don't
know where I'd be now."
inch nails is more like it!"
she died tomorrow, I wouldn't shed a tear. She's a very evil person."
didn't ask to save rock, I don't even like rock that much."
I have no clue who you are, but we both know who I am. So shut the
fuck up and listen to my music."
a family-oriented guy. I've personally started four or five [of them]
this year already."
sound like the Bay City Rollers after an assault by Black Sabbath."
political correctness, that went down with the World Trade Centre."
an egomaniac with an inferiority complex."
been imitated so well I've heard people copy my mistakes."
the bad things that happened to me were directly attributed to drugs
and alcohol. I would never piss on the fucking Alamo
love women, they should be naked backstage all the time."
don't own a gun. Actually, I own about 150 guns."
Stewart, Elton John and I were going to form a band called Hair, Nose
& Teeth, named after the three of us.
was a period during the 1970s when all the acid labs in the world
were working at full production,
some songs I used to do with Black Sabbath before they employed a
midget. How can a four-foot poof sing about the devil?"
McBrain and I have had some belting arguments. We've been virtually
nose-to-nose screaming at each other,
I was going to listen to anybody, I'd listen to me. I love the stuff
I do. It's the greatest.
was supposed to do a solo record many years ago and I wanted Alex
Harvey, Steve Marriott and Bon Scott
people are hams. I'm the whole pig. Look at me, I'll take my shirt
kinda looks like a German military helmet. It says 'Made in Japan'
right back here."
[do a] work out, but the hair doesn't sweat."
Bach hasn't changed. He's still low IQ, high RPM."
the fraud now, bitch? Get in the ring. Go to the gym, motherfucker.
was the Norman Wisdom [the UK's veteran comedy bungler] of burglary.
Glory are not The Beatles, but we've lasted twice as long."
with Mötley Crüe [in the summer of 2005] was a farce. We
did it just for the money.
songwriting on their last two records ['Jugulator' and 'Demolition']
just sucked a big dick."
Flynn talk some more if he's got stupid shit like that to say. He'll
bury himself. But if I was a cartoon character,
guy's a jerk, a lard ass. He's eaten so many cheeseburgers his brain's
believe in metal more than anybody you've ever met. I'm prepared to
die for metal. Are you?"
rap to rock music is a bit like taking the most beautiful girl you've
ever seen to a plastic surgeon,
not really. I don't think that that publication is too widely circulated."
was a dark day when she got naked in Playboy. Oh my God, girl.
fucking hate them. It's just Spinal Tap, isn't it? Just a lark. I'm
not sure they think so, though."
epitaph should read: I told you I was sick."
you're a banquet of a woman!"
got rabies shots for biting the head off a bat, but that's okay -
the bat had to get Ozzy shots."
not how big your pencil is; it's how you write your name."
think that quotes are very dangerous things."
Cliff [Richard]'ll never stop doing 'Summer Holiday', and it's the
same with us."
wouldn't know about any of the newer bands. We're a bit past the pimple
was born in 1949 - which seems like a long time ago. Actually, it
is a long time ago, when I think about it."
cry because they want to experience what you and I feel: the moment.
They live in eternity.
see our logo and think we are blood-drinking devil worshippers. Which
we are, of course."
Lee Roth was great in Van Halen, no question about it. He was one
of the best at being Mr. Rock Star.
our age, you don't want to stop. Because if you stop, you might not
get back up again."
success of The Osbournes as a TV show is an indictment of the soullessness
were doing a dance that [they hoped] would give them some credibility."
won't bother retaliating. If you read what Kerry has said about other
did Jesus Christ really do? He hung out with hard-drinking fishermen."
got a long career ahead of us and it's going to be great. Trust me."
rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not."
rather be dead than cool."
whole grunge thing is so... wrong. It's non-music."
out of every 100 interviews I do, I get a real journalist."
time Robert Plant was set to check into the same room after I checked
out, so I removed every light bulb,
a big lie in this business. That lie is that it's okay to go out in
flames. It doesn't do anybody much good.
I die, I'll probably climb out of the coffin and play the organ at
my own funeral!"
Tate is a two-faced douche bag. His new name should be Geoff Taint.
Screw him, he's now on my shitlist."
are some wimps - pussies - throwing things. But you're not hitting
us, you're hitting the people at the front,
per cent of my life is shit. With Iron Maiden, with my solo stuff,
whatever it is.
are we thinking of calling the next album? 'Whip It Out, Wipe It And
Slide It Back In Again'!"
always wanted to be a basketball player."
I started singing high-pitched metal tunes my mom said, 'You sound
like a dying cat'."
want people around me who are creative, lively, interested and interesting.
Dave [Gilmour] is none of those things.
our new album [1992's 'Dehumanizer'] doesn't sell, Tony [Iommi] and
I are gonna open a bed and breakfast."
name is Francis and I'm an alcoholic."
Ted Nugent is like picking on a cripple. His new band is so bad. 17
people and none of them can play but him."
Lee Roth's problem is that he lives with a man, you see. He's probably
curious about my wife
Montrose is going bald. He's also ugly as shit. He's such an asshole,
I want that to be the headline of this article."
wife's 34 double Ds!"
was put into an escape pod and jettisoned into outer space."
were hilarious. It was like seeing Spinal Tap. I expected them to
go into 'Sex Farm' at any second."
Darkness are a lovely band because I think they're taking the piss.
And if they're serious, well, that's very sad indeed"
the fuck's Dan McCafferty anyway? Get him to talk to Brian May about
was a total piece of shit; a fuckin' asshole. I should've just driven
away and found a real human being."
Axl Rose has the finest voice since Otis Redding."
days ago we saw this guy who had his whole back tattooed with our
portraits. How stupid is that?"
Coverdale is good singer and a super chap. He likes himself a great
deal, which is fine.
called it a day due to a lack of interest from all parties, including
band members, record companies and managers.
must have tea when I'm on the road. No kettle, no show."
Lee Roth should form a new band called Van Inhalen."
there's a nice selection of titties down at the front tonight.
day that this group becomes a machine is the day it's over."
going to have to be relegated for that comment. You're in the first
album without a hit single is like a girl with a real short mini-skirt,
[but] wearing underwear."
a definite possibility that the four members of this band were the
Roman soldiers that nailed Christ to the cross."
can see where Hitler was coming from. Too bad he was such an asshole."
think that Hitler went to Heaven. He did what he felt was right, and
I think that if what you feel you're doing
can guarantee you that we won't be putting our make-up on again."
was sitting in my hotel room with a copy of your magazine and I didn't
know whether to read it or wipe my ass with it."
find myself feeling a tremendous amount of hatred towards Limp Bizkit.
I think of Fred Durst's red baseball cap
are cool. All I eat are vegetarians - except for the occasional mountain
has a woman's name and wears makeup. How original."
said no to drugs, but they didn't listen to me."
Gadaffi is madder than I am. He should stop fucking around with guns
and buy a guitar.
a band that dabbles in some weird shit. 200 years ago, we'd have been
burned as witches."
think I'm a banana tree."
though I've found God, I still love blow jobs. And I still say fuck."
miss Sebastian Bach [being in this band] like I miss genital warts."
never smoked pot before and got really high. I got out my Bic for
one of those lighter tributes
seem to have this big fantasy that me and my husband should just OD
a much happier guy than a lot of people think I am."
[Lawless] said he had an idea for the [sleeve of the] third album.
He said, 'It's me on the front
is no hell. There is only France."
in the band went out and bought Harley Davidsons.
it ego, call it bragging, call it whatever you want, but there's only
one alpha male. And that's me."
journalism is people who can’t write interviewing people who
can’t talk for people who can’t read.”
guess I don't have a problem with him. I mean, if I saw him drowning,
I'd pull him out [of the water]...
is our Ricky Martin moment, except we don't bang and we don't boom."
nothing wrong with human sacrifices. It's about time the earth was
culled to make way for people
being a performer is stumbling around on stage, then I guess he’s
I arrived, Leppard had no guitar amps and they didn’t know where
to get them.
that Jim Steinman knew about the studio was that he didn't like the
colour of the carpet."
kind of kicked off the whole grunge/independent thing
secret of our success is pork scratchings in the trousers.
Diana… what a fox. I’d drag my dick through a mile of
you tried to preface that question I thought, ‘God, that’s
so preposterous’. And yet I understand why you ask.
would rather have my testicles eaten by Hannibal Lecter than tour
with Mötley Crüe again.”
Crüe's 'Dr Feelgood' and 'Girls Girls Girls' are great songs,
but listen to
since my first album with Wolfsbane, he’s slagged me off in
vicious, snide and personal ways.
does the new album sound like? Ha ha. if you were a salmon and I were
always figured that everyone had a bush. It wasn’t specifically
female. We all come from bush.”
the time we finish this song, all you women will have so much cream
in your jeans
are modern day cowboys. We ride into town, put on a show, take the
money, hit the bar,
tried to climb inside the bass bins, took off most of my clothes and
any of you guys into dead-fucks? You know what I like best about those
little ladies that live six feet underground?
reporter in Helsinki recently told me, ‘Jon, I listened to your
songs all the way through the 1970s
is almost like a beached whale. If it’s pushed into the water
it swims quite well,
the 1970s I looked like a walking tumbleweed.
had a summer tour being booked with Queensrÿche, but they backed
out and fucked us over.
Dave Grohl. Let him get up there and play ‘Mr Crowley’,
he can’t do it.
Wendy O. Williams jumped you, you stayed jumped.”
anybody out there thinks that they can play this lick, then come up
onto this stage and I’ll suck their dick right here.
respect anyone’s lifestyle, providing it doesn’t involve
minors. And by that I mean children.
at the pinnacle of our decline.”
I was doing cocaine regularly I would say it was very much out of
had a couple of drinks. I started in 1970 and finished in 1985. It
was a very big drink.”
very little femininity in what Metallica do. Their gigs are like big
an intelligent, well-read guy. But somehow he can’t connect
want to be the loudest band in the world. We’ve already had
people throwing up at gigs,
I thought too much about how influential I’ve been, I’d
become more of a turd than I already am.”
as age humbles me it feeds my arrogance. There’s still nothing
that interests me as much as myself.”
hope I die before I turn into Pete Townshend.”
reason I started with prostitutes was solely to work on my negotiating
skills. Once I mastered negotiating
rock music, you’re nothing until you’ve slept with Winona
[Ryder] and had a feud with me.”
a romantic realist. I love basking in the spotlight as much as anyone
else, but it’s not real.
doing what we’ve always wanted to do. I mean, if I were a dustman,
which I used to be,
can out-party The Nuge. People can get downwind of last week’s
laundry that I just fondled momentarily,
you look at any bands of note, you’ll see that there’s
always been a one-two punch;
the history of rock, every band has sold themselves on their sexuality.
With the exception of Marillion.”
I first met him, he couldn’t even speak English. It was all,
‘fuck’, ‘cunt’, ‘piss’, ‘shit’.
reunion with Iron Maiden would swamp what both parties have achieved
since we split up. Maybe it would be fun
Blackmore was a huge early influence on me, but after that I had to
find my own way.”
in this band categorically believes that Rob Halford should never
sing with us again.
– I’m taking over. Before I join your band I want it clear
that I’m taking over now.
claim that I once shat in Michael Schenker’s shoe and made him
put it on is rubbish,
me, there were a few moments of brilliance and 60-70 per cent shit.”
the end of the day, it was [a case of] better the devil you know.”
last time I played Hammersmith Odeon, I looked out in the front row
and thought the pig season had opened.”
the end, Tony Banks raised his glass. I thought he was going to toast
us, but he said,
discovered that I scream the same way whether I’m about to be
devoured by a Great White
got my instructions from an angel I call Metatron. He said, ‘I
will help you if you help me solder back molecules
Hawkwind fired me, I came home and fucked all their old ladies. Not
the ugly ones, of course. But at least four.”
I’ve got a ten-inch dick!”
never forgive Ken Hensley for all the skulduggery. He’s become
a born-again Christian…
David Ellefson. He’s been a professional ass-licker for his
just didn’t turn up at rehearsals one day. I haven’t seen
album’s bass solo describes Achilles after he has killed Hector
– brutally and without mercy, I might add,
Jay French accused me of calling every magazine in the world and telling
them to print pictures of me, not the band.
cheerful because it's my wedding anniversary today. I've been married
to Cindy for 15 years.
that famous Liverpool Empire show [in 1976], I couldn’t even
stand. I was making farmyard noises.
was in the studio playing the solo at the end of ‘Don’t
Stop Believing’, trying to bebop and jazz it a little.
grew up like my mom, Sandy Holmes. She’s a mean motherfucking
I wanted to look like Jimi Hendrix, but I could never quite pull it
as much a punk band as anything.”
love trains. In fact, Pete Way’s got a Hornby train set, a double
O gauge. He often takes it on tour
sick to death of people saying we’ve made 11 albums that sound
exactly the same.
had no plans to join Black Sabbath. I went out for a few drinks with
Tony Iommi and Geezer Butler,
better than Metallica. We’re better musicians, better players.
Put it this way, they can try to walk onstage
don’t know how we made it this far without being rhythmic.”
leaving Rainbow, it’s nice to be with a stable group.”
me, Metallica is a shitty band. Their music is crap, and they won't
be here in a few years.”
thing I’m proud of it that we never became housewives’
choice. You can’t iron to Iron Maiden.”
don’t think that Yes have made a decent record since ‘Tormato’
always liked a good polish. We were all blokes together, nobody was
wimps really, aren’t we? We could write the hardest rock song
a bit like regretting you never fucked Kate Bush. There’s not
much you can do about it now, is there?”
think it was easy to reunite this band? How tense was the first rehearsal?
hope that everybody who takes drugs dies in their own fucking vomit.”
used to stand on my head onstage. When Uli Jon Roth was with us, we
had a song called ‘Fly To The Rainbow’.
was seven years old when I lost my virginity and it was with a girl
called Margaret, who was 12.
was 11 or 12 when I first had sex. I had to pay for it because it
was with a whore."
Hagar may throw a party, I am the party.”
Zeppelin progressed into this great band, yet as they progressed each
individual had to progress.
not the sort of thing you can put on in the background, then go and
cook breakfast or have a wank.”
I drinking today? Well, put it this way, I’m not not drinking.”
been to rehab 15 times and I'm a recovering heroin addict.
could be pompous if I wanted to, because my full name is Yngwie J
Af Malmsteen – the ‘Af’ part being
people want to snigger at Manowar, it’s up to them. I’d
rather have 10,000 warriors as fans than a million posers.”
a monastery? King Crimson does that to people.”
look stage right and [guitarist] Marc Ford was drooling on himself.
It was sad. When he’s sober
go more for spirit than actual beauty. There’s a few Russian
gymnasts who’ve caught my fancy.”
‘The Razor’s Edge’ album features some of my highest
notes since ‘Back In Black’.
those bands suck. Sometimes I think that if I’d had a crystal
ball in 1985 when we were writing ‘I’m The Man’,
people have seen us as a joke act, but that’s just misinterpretation.
life revolves around creamy stuff, I just can’t get enough of
it. After a while it looks like I’ve just shit Johnny Winter.”
thought it was normal to inject drugs.”
I left Status Quo they were one of the top ten bands in the world,
now they’re just a laughing stock.
Crüe is like a fist. If anyone ever left, the band would break
honestly don’t think Vivian Campbell would know artistic freedom
if it bit him on the private parts.”
tried to be a human being most of the time.”
I have any theories on why our audience keeps coming back?
Floyd’s ‘The Division Bell’ album is just crap.”
would chop off my left nut to have done the fuckin’ things I
did in the past year.”
being the most attractive bod in the world, I don’t get surrounded
like girls, we think they’re nice. You tend to get called an
old bender if you sing about boys.”
could do a 15-minute fart into a paper bag and some people would be
more happy with that than a three-minute classic.”
Powell was a chocolate fanatic. He had a whole wardrobe full of chocolates.
We would say to me,
not the No.1 band – I don’t think we’d want to be
– but White Lion will be staying at No.2,
not a rock band, they’ve got no tunes, no chords or choruses.
They’ve no idea how to behave onstage
fuck everything that moves. And if it doesn’t move, we work
females are appallingly unattractive.”
I compose the music, I compose the melody lines, I write most of the
an ignorant little sod, a starstruck little asshole.”
still meet people who say, ‘Don’t you remember me? I’m
the guy who put the roof on your house’,
I’ve done things that people would never believe, in limousines
or telephone booths.
make money, but not that much. Our drummer, Richard Chadwick, lives
in a council house.”
my publishing money cause problems with the rest of the band [who
want the sound that everyone else is trying to get away from.”
Hendrix mentioned to our conga player Michael Carabello that he was
thinking of joining our band.
never been a dictator. I’m a breath of fresh air to work with,
as a matter of fact.”
of rock stars getting fan letters, we need to write letters to the
down in a pool of vomit.”
still a mental infant.”
there was a town, he painted it. And if he missed one, he went back.”
are either lesbians or people who haven’t had good sex yet.”
old Van Halen, when I was in it, makes you wanna drink, dance and
bought him from his mother for 12 camels.”
always thought that if I died, I’d come back as a fire hydrant.”
last band I went to see? Fucking hell, it was the Spice Girls. How
embarrassing is that?”
fucked this chick in a coffin the other day. It was cool.”
I meet a woman, I don’t think, ‘Gee, I wonder if she’s
read the latest thesis by Stephen Hawking?’
who says I’m a Blackmore clone is musically retarded. My guitar
playing is as far away from his